You know you live in
Africa...
1.
Even in English, you “welcome”
people to everything—the Swahili translation of “karibu.”
2.
You get your Christmas stocking in February, even though your mom mailed
it in early November.
3.
You gawk at white people in town, though you refrain from shouting
“mzungu!” as it is hardly polite.
4.
The sound of unaccented (see: American) English is like a big hug from
home.
5.
Your mantra is “low expectations, positive attitudes!”
6.
Donkeys eating dogfood on your neighbor’s front porch doesn’t even
strike you as odd.
7.
You see the invisible “middle lane” of the two lane freeway that is used
for passing—sometimes with a narrow margin of error toward oncoming traffic.
8.
When watching an American film, you worry about the people in the movie falling
asleep without mosquito nets.
9.
You never accept the first price quoted, and you still pay far too much
for your produce.
10. You give yourself
haircuts...sometimes in the dark by the light of a headlamp.
11. When a group of guys are bored
on a Friday night, one suggests, “let’s go crocodile hunting.” And then...they do!
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